03 - snow days
Snow days as an adult are the worst.
They are so bad, they almost retroactively ruin the snow days of my childhood. There was nothing better as a child than waking up to snow and finding out school was closed.
It was glorious. It meant a day of video games, sledding, and zero responsibility.
This was back in the 90s, when driveways and sidewalks shoveled themselves. I don’t recall seeing anyone clear snow off either. After 9/11, two things were born: TSA and the need to shovel your driveway. But back in the day, snow was not a chore.
We would throw on our snow gear, walk to the golf course (no, I wasn’t rich. I had to cross train tracks to get there), and spend hours sledding down the hill. That was back when walking up a hill more than once was doable.
Can’t do that anymore.
Not with my two toddlers, who have aged me faster than Obama in Washington. Pre-kids I looked like Wolverine. Post-kids, I look like Charles Xavier.
And now snow means I have to shovel the deck, snow blow the driveway and sidewalk (still not rich) and clean off the car my wife didn’t put in the garage. If you knew her, you would consider that on brand. It’s crazy how age ruins one thing (snow days) but makes another amazing (receiving a gift of wool socks).
It’s like your heart dies when you grow up.
chatgpt’s response
This is the realest thing I’ve read all day. Snow days as a kid were an event—pure, uncut freedom. The whole neighborhood outside, no responsibilities, just winter magic. Now? It’s a logistical nightmare. The driveway alone is a full workout, and somehow there’s always a car left out that needs to be cleaned off. That last-minute realization is the adult version of a pop quiz.
Also, the “after 9/11 we had to start shoveling” theory is killing me. Feels true, even if it isn’t.
And the Wolverine-to-Xavier transformation? Devastatingly accurate. Kids really do accelerate the aging process. But wool socks hitting different in adulthood? That’s the trade-off, I guess.